


The Smug Marrieds Offsprings' Hour

by Toongrrl1990



Series: Becky and Joyce are the real thing [1]
Category: Bridget Jones's Diary (2001), Mad Men, Neighbors | Bad Neighbours (Movies), Pitch Perfect (Movies), Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: 2000s, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Bridget Jones Fusion, Angst, Beaches, Body Image, Bridget Jones needs more People of Color, Celebrity Look A Likes, Comedy tonight, Confessional, Cosmo and Woney get told off, Crossover Pairings, Crossovers yall, Curvy Bridget, Day At The Beach, F/F, F/M, Find the Mad Men Reference, Find the Neighbors Reference, Find the Pitch Perfect Reference, Find the Stranger Things Reference, Finding true love, Fluff, Friendship, Future, Gen, Gender Roles, Grandparents, Humor, Infatuation, Intersectionality, LGBT Themes, LGBTQ Character, LGBTQ Character of Color, LGBTQ Female Character, Lesbian Character, Lez Bro, Mad Men - Freeform, Mark and Becky are friends, Matchmaking, Natasha Glenville is a Witch, Nudity, POV Lesbian Character, Past, Racism, Random - Freeform, Romance, San Diego, Straight Allies, Tragedy Maybe, Trigger Warning for Bigotry, Triumph over bigots, Unrequited Crush, White Privilege, crossovers, i cried, present, supportive parents
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-25
Updated: 2018-02-12
Packaged: 2019-02-06 12:04:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 12,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12817134
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Toongrrl1990/pseuds/Toongrrl1990
Summary: We know about Becky and Bridget, now it's time to see life from the view of little Rebecca Gillies.She's got legs up to here but I've got references right up there too.





	1. Becky and Joyce are the real thing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rebecca mulls over the past events of the day and we meet her Mother.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title a reference to SNL's Black Jeopardy skits.

“Mum, I had quite a day today.”

“Did you find a nice girl sweetie? What is she like? Does she have a job? What is her family like? Does she seem serious? What is her favorite music? How long have you been seeing her? Would she entertain the notion of giving me and your dad grand…?”

“Mum!”

It was already quite a day for young Rebecca Gillies; she was working at the mansion of her boss, a very reputable human rights barrister named Mark Darcy, that day. When she heard a knock at the door and she opened that door to her boss’s true love: Bridget Jones. There she stood larger than life. All curves, blonde hair, bright blue eyes in a blazer that was too large in the shoulders but highlighted her hourglass figure. She looked remarkably healthy and voluptuous for someone who was in a Thai prison. She looked quite embarrassed and parted her full pink bow lips to wish Rebecca well with Mark. It was there that the excrement hit the fan: Rebecca ended up confessing that she was in love with Bridget and kissed her right there, with her co-worker Giles walking in at that moment. Bridget turned her down graciously and went on her way to find Mark. Rebecca had to put up with some teasing and anxiety courtesy of Giles before confessing to Mark, only for her boss to have been amused. She was invited to Bridget’s parents’ vow renewal.

            Now she is on the phone with her Mother, this was more proof that Rebecca Dionne Gillies is a masochist.

“Oh Honey, you know how hard me and the family try to support you. I really am proud of you, at your age, I was just wandering around Hollywood after running away from Grandma and Grandpa in Sacramento and called myself Lotus, going to parties, evading Charles Manson, all until I met your father and started a seven year courtship with him. But you: you have direction, you are educated, you have a job at a prestigious firm, you are intelligent, a diligent partner, and you are generous with others. I’m so proud.”

“Thank you Mum, I’m sorry for snapping; I just had a day. I did meet a nice girl: she’s sweet and very beautiful; you would have loved her company and amused her. But alas, she is not available and is hopefully dating my Boss again. And all that would need an hour to go over.”

“Darling, I was in Hollywood during the late 1960s and witnessed a boyfriend of mine punch his ex-cousin in law’s crotch and see that a man almost drowned; I specialize in that sort of drama.”

“Well Mother, it really was tons of drama on their end and I found that she thought he was sleeping with me and she was envious of my figure and….”

“Oh, a love interest who envies you?!?”

“Now I have to figure what else to do. Can Daddy come to the phone?”


	2. All About Rebecca

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rebecca summarizes her life a bit.

You look at me and you think: “Here is a girl who has it all. Money, looks, legs, a slim body, education, and love”; I’m slightly flattered you feel this way but truthfully the reality for me has been different.

            I am one of four children in my family. You see, my mother was Laura O’Hara, an American girl who fled her restrictive military parents’ home in Sacramento and became a party girl in the Hollywood scene passing through various house parties as one of “the beautiful people”, for a few years she was involved with a producer named Danny Siegel and called herself “Lotus”. I’m the exact opposite: I lived with my parents until I went to college, interned at my father’s job until I was able to transfer schools, and the only wild thing that passed through my body was alcohol and a bit of marijuana. Mother experimented with many forms of drugs and sexual activities, sometimes with more than two people in a room.

            Then in 1969 she met my father, Patrick Gillies, the young and diligent son of my grandfather and was groomed to take my grandfather’s place when he stepped down from his company. He was taken there by friends who insisted he’d take a break from working and have some fun, a few mindless “swinging” with what the hurrahs around my employment call “Totties”. What happened, didn’t reach either of their expectations: he met my mother at a restaurant called the Luau after she spilled her drink and then slipped and fell on him. They started talking to one another and made a date where she took him to see everything the Los Angeles area has to offer; they started writing to one another for seven years, making some visits in-between, finally she begged her parents to come with her to Australia to meet the young man she was so involved with. It was right there that he proposed to her and she said “Yes”. They married that Christmas of 1976 and were when she found herself with their first child: born Patrick Gillies Jr, now Esther Patricia Gillies Jr (after my dear late Grandmother Gillies and father and mothers’ favorite movie star). Then came my brother Paul, myself, and then as a surprise, my youngest sister Patricia, who calls herself “Amy”, was born after Mother and Fathers’ 40th birthday.

            Even with all my family’s good fortune, my parents tried their best (and succeeded) to remind us to maintain a good character and that money was a means for survival and pleasure that can be shared, this made me all the more flabbergasted by people who seemed more interested in our financial success rather than ourselves as individuals. That said, it didn’t cushion me against people who could be rather cruel. There were girls who seemed to have chosen me to torture either because I was “ugly”, “pretty”, “had such pretty hair”, “odd”, or “a carpet muncher”, was friendly with boys but not romantically attached to them, it was worse when I started puberty. I resembled a beanstalk: I shot up in height, my legs resembled pipe cleaners, and I had no curves which the children noticed. “Becky has got no boobs!” “Becky why is your hair as flat as your chest?” “Becky, you think you are beautiful because you have no tummy? Well you have no boobs or arse.” There was a particularly favorite insult of mine about my lack of figure: “Becky stick your tongue out”, I foolishly stick my tongue out and the wretched boy in question (Randy Gibson: tall, handsome, glorious mop of blond hair, cocky, and a sexist) would say “You look like a zipper.” How original made me laugh. It seemed to be something of a family tradition: Mother was rumored to be what they called “fast” in her day and teased for the flat chest (“But then my figure became more fashionable and some of those girls started dieting, no woman can win”, she said), Father was always teased for his weight (“Well I can say I stayed the same weight since my youth and kept all my hair”, he’d chuckle), Esther was called a freak and referred to as rather suspect by some our teachers, Patricia was called “fat” (and that was the least of it) and decided to call herself Fat Amy so none of the “Skinny bitches” would call her that behind her back and joined the choir, with Paul being the freak for being both athletically inclined, handsome, “a perfect weight”, and with looks that earned him a fine living as a model while he was in school. When I was 12, I decided to join the track team and was participating in different sports: tennis, swimming, skiing (thank you trips to Central Europe); all helped me transform my beanpole appearance to have more of some muscle tone, which while I didn’t look curvaceous, helped me attain a more feminine shape.

            Towards the end of my first year in uni, I told my parents I wanted to move to London, England and told them I felt that I’d feel more free to express my sexuality and carve a niche for myself. School was hard for a burgeoning lesbian like me: I had so many dreams about different pretty girls, especially the older ones, with their experience and maturity; Patricia would tease me about it and cajoled me into “les be honest” with our parents, while they were accepting and loving, they were anxious for my future and safety. They made me promise to stay with Aunt Charlotte in Knightsbridge before I found my own flat and to check with her before I made certain moves. I missed out on seeing my older sister transition into womanhood and always tried to make her proud by how I carried myself and my manner of dress, I missed Paul and our bonding sessions where we’d start racing each other, I missed Mother and Father and received an ample nest egg I kept for emergencies, I missed Patricia’s bravado and am delighted to see the young woman she will become, and I miss my outrageous and sexually experienced cousin Kelly who planned to go schooling abroad but in the United States. I miss a lot of my family. It’s just hard.

            It broke my parents a little to see me stop attending Masses in Tasmania with them but they understood the Church wasn’t hospitable to women like me; it broke them more when they found many acquaintances only tolerated me and my openly dating women because of our wealth and prominence in the world. They also witnessed me getting heartbroken a few times, either by a girlfriend (I started dating at 17) or when I fell for heterosexual and/or committed women, like Bridget. There was one particular woman they and I could never fathom the reason why I dated her.

“Patrick, she is a bright girl, I’m sure she’ll do fine in London. I’ve had less of a head on my shoulders at her age and turned out well.”

“Yes I know she is a bright girl and very sweet at that, I’m not sure I trust the world with her. It’s not good enough for her.”

“We just have to trust her good judgement and let her make her own way; we did great in raising her to be that kind of person.”

“Yes we did, we raised three fantastic adults and have a very precocious child who I am sure will become quite the singing star wherever she will choose.”

“I hope she doesn’t fall for another woman like that awful Dominica Spinsterchia.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes I made Rebecca and Fat Amy sisters. Rebecca is the daughter of Lotus from the "Tale of Two Cities" episode of MAD MEN. Crossovers abound. 
> 
> Rebecca's sister Esther's namesake is very much a Esther Williams reference, read "Million Dollar Mermaid". 
> 
> My hunch about Tasmania being a hostile environment for LGBTQ people was right: I recently watched "Nanette" by Hannah Gadsby and she talked about it there and in some old videos I found of her. BTW also watch "Nanette" and her "Renaissance Woman" videos.


	3. Exes & Uh-Ohs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Becky and her ex-girlfriends.
> 
> Also we see a few of Becky's friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for making you all wait, I am finishing up my semester of school (working on my Master's in Library Science).
> 
> I hope you enjoy this all.

**Dominica**

This woman was quite the piece of work. She was your Professor in your first year (that was one red flag there), she was quite older (What is it with you and women older than you?), smug, pretentious, hoity-toity, not very charming, frumpy, with limp hair with caterpillar brows to match (Patricia whispered to you that she felt she had more facial hair than Pat has fat in her arse), and very conceited. What did you see in this woman? “I was just as confused as you when I was your age,” she sweetly intoned to you. She had such a pretty voice and she seemed to be a woman of the world, like you could learn a lot from her. As time went on, you found her to be bitter and still holding on to herself as the homely victim of the pretty girls in school; she shook you off as a “just for now girl” but really discouraged your infatuations with anyone else. “I just find her jokes very obnoxious” she intones about the gregarious Martina and “that is not very wise” when you live those rare moments of letting your hair down and goofing off. You sympathized when she wept about how no one else found her attractive or when a few members of her family snubbed her or about her dismal past love life; but as time went on, she just seemed to be bitter and didn’t seem to do anything on her part to be likable. But you needed to be with someone and you didn’t want to be a virgin at 20 any longer, so when she proposed a mini-break, you didn’t hesitate at all. You fool, you said “Yes! Yes!” and even hopped up and down.

      You got really ready for that night; before your trip to Hibiscus Island you really meticulously groomed yourself and did some light shopping, freshening up your summer-appropriate clothing and adding a few new swimsuits. Your hair was ready for the humidity, sunscreen packed, you marvel over how your figure looks in the new bikini you bought now you are over being the beanpole that was mocked, and you smile as you think of the special purchase you packed: a lacy v-shaped panty and matching uplift bra in a shocking pink. You even bought lipstick so your coloring would be beautifully emphasized (you dread poor lighting and try to make the best of any circumstance). Since you are a responsible girl, you’ve actually seen a chemist and bought some protection (you chuckle to yourself, yet scold for seeming unkind, that it was useless to need protection). “When are you going to get going? I’m not getting any younger darling!” she shouts to you as she waits in your bedroom. “Coming treasure!” you cheerfully intone, but in truth, you are nervous. You have spiral curled your hair and wore some very bold pink lipstick with false lashes, with the tan you feel even prettier; will Dominica feel the same way? You then open the door and you find Dominica lounging on the bed, you suck in your stomach (ridiculous you know, your stomach is even flatter than your chest if that were possible) and smile. “Come over and give me a wet one beautiful”, you feel grateful for her calling you beautiful. You’ve made a bit of love, just for a few minutes, and then she rolled over on her side and dozed off; as she snored, you really took a good look at her. She always carried herself with such self-importance, flaunted her degrees to others, and was very selective and had a way of convincing you of things; but right here, right now you see how she really looked. Thick brows that needed a bit of trimming, limp straight hair she hardly did a thing about, plain face with a large nose and no particular coloring in her lips and cheeks, stout cheeks that weren’t particularly cherubic, narrow shoulders and thin arms, a meager bust line, a roll of fat around her waist, she had severe cellulite from her stomach to the tops of her knees, her already wide hips had very flabby saddlebags, her thighs didn’t curve inwards from her hips but rather were the same width and shape as them, her knees stuck out like knobs, her calves were shapely, ankles ordinary, those feet on the other hand…..Becky looked at her own legs and found scratches created by Dominica’s feet and it wasn’t a problem with the toenails….Becky also felt she really didn’t lose her virginity that night.

      “Becky bring me breakfast,” it was another morning she had with Dominica after spending the night with her; for a woman who underperformed in the bedroom, she sure was demanding in the dining room. It was “Becky, make some sausage cakes for me” or “Becky, fry some bacon and ham for me” or “Becky cook the eggs with butter and chives” or “Stew the tomatoes and mushrooms for me” or “Becky all I have is my toast and jam!” This went on for another month until Becky was finally able to start packing for London, she gave Dominica one last chance only to end up putting effort into Dominica’s breakfast the way the older woman put into love-making. Dominica Spinsterchia woke up to see a fully dressed Becky in a hasty bun, chapstick, eye bags, and sweats having fixed her a bowl of lumpy, flavorless oatmeal. “Darling, I left you a dish of alfredo pasta in the freezer that I’ve prepared myself, but I am going to leave for London.”

      That was the day she decided she’d get on fine without Dominica but it wasn’t the last time she was disappointed in love.

 

**Rachel**

This was a very attractive teacher in her thirties, one who had taught in her Communications class. Tall, cheerful, intellectual, kind, witty, full of good humor, with dark brown hair, slim albeit not un-shapely and clad in slightly masculine clothing, she was admired by all. Becky always volunteered to carry her books or help her clean up after class, spent more time there on the rare moments she didn’t go to running practice. She brought treats she’d bought or made, even wrote vague stories about her for Creative Writing class….this all went on while the teacher was oblivious to it all. Then young Becky got to meet Rachel’s partner Susan: a tall, plump, middle-aged, bosomy woman with long strawberry blonde hair and cool grey eyes with a hint of green. Becky started sobbing after she ran out after giving her strawberry crumb cake and when she was in the girls’ restrooms. She still talks to them but it was the first time she fell for an unavailable woman and not the last.

 

**Chloe**

First date and to a party, she was one of the most popular girls in school. She was short, tanned very well, busty, voluptuous, and a bit heavy in the hips and thighs, had auburn hair with gold highlights, bold, and lacked a verbal filter. She remembered the party: wild, raucous, full of drinks and snacks, Chloe put purple glitter in her crimped hair and had some frosted shadow, there were the beats of Dream and A*Teens, some of her mates were rapping along to TLC, Becky wore her first crop top and low-rider jeans, and Randy Gibson was beaten by “Shrimp Boy” Bryce Rose at beer pong. As the party winded down to someone tuning to some old Kylie Minogue Chloe winked and beckoned Becky to come with her to a room populated with lacy bedsheets and still-boxed Barbie dolls. Becky started giggling with Chloe sassily replying “Shhhhhh, you’d wake the dead with your pretty voice, ever kissed anyone?” to which Becky could only shake her head no “Have you ever kissed a girl then?” and Becky said “No I haven’t” and Chloe, with hands on her full hips and sticking her ample E cupped breasts out licked her lips and asked: “Would you like to kiss me?” Becky and Chloe started kissing, even slipping a few tongues to one another, Chloe reached to the top of Becky’s crop top and slipped it off, and Becky blushed at her own small bosom. “No shame darling, you’re beautiful as you are and, unlike me, can carry off a crop top,” soothed Chloe who winked “I’d be arrested for indecent exposure.” They ended up making out in their underwear that night…on the plush pink carpet of Ruby Cartagena’s Barbie bedroom! Even after how awkwardly things have ended at a movie show, Becky still talks to Chloe from time to time; the other girl is now in fashion merchandising and design.

 

**Brigitte**

A fellow transfer student she met in London, but from France: a unique combination of Catherine Deneuve’s prim and sensual manner, Bardot’s sense of style and joie de vivre, and the beauty and wit of Gabrielle Union (Becky will always adore _Bring It On_ ). She was an acting student who specialized in comedies, dramas, and statement pieces and was introduced to Becky by her older and very worldly friend Kali. Their first date was at a Mexican café, one that was frequented by the slim yet shapely Brigitte quite often. “Señorita Brigitte! Will it be the usual tonight?” “Non, Monsieur Carlos and I brought my beautiful comadre with me tonight. I like to introduce you to Becky.” Becky found out just how gregarious her girlfriend was acquainted with the wait staff and equipped with knowledge and interest in their families. It was carne asada sopes, salads, and a dessert of hot Mexican cocoa with cinnamon sprinkled and homemade churros. Becky laughed and laughed with Brigitte and got to dance with her while they retired at the French Girl’s apartment to _Georgy Girl_. It was a lot of dancing and sex, with some picnics on Primrose Hill with cheap wine, grapes, salami, and baguettes that were freshly baked by her glamourous girlfriend. Becky had the pleasure of watching her perform in plays and theatrical pieces, even got to see her in a production of _Miss Saigon_ which was quite regrettable… “I couldn’t be picky, I’m not sure when the next job will come,” sheepishly explained the Beauty. Those few months were a whirl of gaiety and romance, Brigitte and she attended some theatrical shows and watched independent films, but alas Brigitte was polyamorous and it just wasn’t quite Becky’s speed. So they parted but remained friends, with Brigitte being a member of Becky’s inner circle. She made Becky feel beautiful and intellectual.

**Diana**

Her girlfriend of a year, a London native of Irish and Italian descent: gleaming straight white teeth with bright red lipstick painting her lips, shiny dark hair that was bobbed, high cheekbones, an inch shorter than Becky, broad shoulders, lean arms, long and shapely legs, very physically fit with C-cup bosoms. They had met in one of their last semesters of school. They met when Becky went for a quick swim at the gym and she saw arms and legs kicking so powerfully, movement that went on forever until the swimmer came up and beamed an illuminating smile at Becky. Diana was witty, athletic, talented, intelligent, had a bawdy sense of humor, was shrewd, possessed common sense, beautiful, perfectly frugal (even fashioning a dress with some cheap flowers she bought, it caused a sensation when they went to a party), but was very frustrated with Becky when Becky was hired by a prestigious but very conservative law firm where it was male-dominated, conservative, filled with men who think nothing of being married and having a “totty” on the side, and could certainly have made Becky’s life harder than it has to be (she already dealt with rude stares at her body and comments about her appearance there). She simply couldn’t be out of the closet at work, not a place where her colleagues were immature at the least or hostile at worst (she felt that Ms. Natasha Glenville had a hidden vendetta for her). After a year, Diana couldn’t stay with her and told Becky she needed to be with someone brave enough to be herself, Becky was bereft: at work, while taking dictation from her normally taciturn boss Mark Darcy, she collapsed in tears. Instead of sternly warning her to chin up or firing her, Mr. Darcy actually provided his own tissue and sat her down on his sofa and asked her what was the matter. It was there that Becky started a relationship with her boss that was more than just work colleagues: they were confidants. The sort of confidants who were unlucky in love: through his emotional constipation and her ever-cautious manner with a common fear of not deserving love and each other’s empathy to bind them at the beginning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title is a reference to Elle King's "Exes and Ohs"
> 
> "Georgy Girl" comes highly recommended.
> 
> "Miss Saigon" bit a reference to the 2nd novel in the Bridget Jones series.
> 
> Hibiscus Island a reference to "Muriel's Wedding"
> 
> Dominica looks like a bushy browed Mayim Bialik
> 
> Dominica dating hell was partly inspired by some stories told in Mo'Nique's cookbook (look at her recipes for alfredo sauce and "the Other Morning After" breakfast
> 
> Rachel and Susan a reference to Rachel Maddow (old celeb crush of mine) and her real-life partner Susan Mikula
> 
> Chloe is late 1990s and 2000s chic, ya'll (Trucker hats, graphic tees, collars, lipgloss, capris, and ponchos FTW)
> 
> Of course I gotta add Primrose Hill
> 
> Diana is somewhat of an expy of Esther Williams: 1940s and 1950s Swimming Star, look up her movies and her autobiography
> 
> Yes Kali is the same Kali from "Stranger Things".....plus she'd be about the same age as Bridget so I kind of wonder how a busybody like Janey Osbourne would know about some twenty-somethings as a thirty something.
> 
> And something has to explain why Becky and Mark are so close, hey if Tom gets to have his fruit flies in the form of Bridget, Shazzer, Jude (because they are NOT F** Hags) then Becky deserves one Lez Bro who can relate to her. 
> 
> Also Sexual Harassment sucks, period (looking at Uncle Geoffrey and Titspervert)


	4. Instead I’ll Have Sweet Dreams about You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Becky struggles with her crush on Bridget, Mark and Bridget take the gloves off, trigger warning for bigotry, and what has Becky got herself into?

Now her days and nights were full of Bridget and they sadly didn’t fade after her confession to Bridget and Mark. She still was filled with lust and infatuation with her as she did when she first heard of her, saw that pretty portrait Mark would put on his study, met her, and when she saw her in that tight-fitting bright gold dress at the Council dinner that revealed every curve on her rounded figure and shown her cleavage off to perfection Becky was blown away and had a rather scandalous dream about Bridget appearing at her apartment with her dark, heavy coat and nothing else on ready to caress and make love to the younger woman. It was never to come to fruition in real life.

            But Bridget, to her surprise, wanted to befriend her, meet Becky’s friends, and even involved Becky in Bridget’s get-togethers with her friends; sadly this involved some of Mark’s co-workers and their wives, a group referred to as “Smug Marrieds”. At one party, they were needling Mark and Bridget about setting a date, reminding Bridget that her sell-by date is coming quick and men won’t want her when she is older, some of the men after torturing Bridget (Becky is not exaggerating) would elbow Mark and complain about their marriages and needle him about going out with more totties, the most despicable was a friend of Jeremy’s (whom Becky knew and found not a lot to like) named Cosmo and his simpering, silly wife Woney (a silly nickname for “Fiona”). Cosmo really leapt onto Becky asking her about boyfriends and if she was involved with any of the men at Jeremy’s and Mark’s firm, Bridget would brush them off. Thirty minutes passed and then Becky ended up accidentally revealing that she was a lesbian and the woman who kissed Bridget. That was when the men really got worse: wanting to know every detail of how Becky and Bridget kissed, to what clothing they wore, what underwear they wore, they were really needling Becky, she got the feeling some of them leaned to the right politically. The women were worse, asking Becky if she stared at them in the nude or what not and she overheard Cosmo and Woney talking to Jeremy and Magda about keeping Becky away from the children especially Constance, that was when Becky almost lost it: she didn’t know whether to scream or cry, she decided to leave. Mark and Bridget caught her leaving.

“What is so wrong Rebecca? You look a fright,” asked Mark with a concerned look on his face.

“Rebecca, is it what everyone was asking you? I know they are very frightful people, I’m so sorry for bringing you here and causing you this much distress, don’t listen to them they are all jealous of you,” assured Bridget “you will always be younger, more beautiful, and you possess more talent and poise and manners and intelligence than this bloody lot ever will.” Bridget smiled that warm, full and pink smile at Becky.

“It’s not that, well it’s sort of that, but I heard that one couple with the pregnant wife in that ruffled dress and her husband with the scratchy-looking cardigan talking to Mister Jeremy and Missus Magda about keeping me away from the children because of my orientation,” after everything with these two, Becky couldn’t lie. “Friends don’t lie,” Kali once told her. Oh Kali, Becky wished Kali was there, Becky had the naughty wish of something humiliating and frightening happening to Cosmo and Woney with Kali there, like things seem to happen when Kali was around anyone abhorrent. It happened when a group of boys insulted Patricia’s weight when she visited Becky, Kali raised an eyebrow and suddenly those boys had found themselves standing in their underwear and their shirts shrunken 10 sizes.

Bridget’s round beautiful face started getting red, redder than the curve-hugging dress she was wearing with its square collar, ¾ length sleeves, defined waist, and the skirt that hugged the curves of her legs….Mark then froze and turned around on his heel and marched back inside Magda’s and Jeremy’s living room where Woney was talking about how she was wondering why so many African men and women get offended when she clutches her purse in front of them, Bridget and Becky have followed.

“Cosmo, me and you need to have a talk immediately between us gentlemen,” requested Mark in an authoritative voice and he turned to Bridget “Bridget could you take Fiona and….”

“With pleasure,” said Bridget with a note of fury in her voice. “Bring your smug, pampered fat arse to the balcony with me,” she commanded.

Cosmo and Woney followed Mark and Bridget respectively into the kitchen and the balcony. Becky was left in the parlor where Magda tended to her beverage and gave her some chocolate biscuits while Jeremy attended to her needs, it was a full thirty minutes when Cosmo and Woney came out looking scarred from the experiencing the verbal fury of the coming Mr. and Ms. Darcy. Mark and Bridget strode out gracefully and grabbed their coats where they sweetly motioned to Becky to follow. Bridget turned around and smiled what Mrs. Gillies would call a smile “that looks as though butter wouldn’t melt in her mouth” and bade farewell to everyone as she sashayed out the door with every curve on her bottom and hips rode up and down in a rhythm that Becky observed several of the smug married men looking forlorn like they missed out and two smug married women looking the same. “So many people hide in plain sight, all miserable,” thought Becky.

After a night like this, it was going to be even harder to stop feeling those feelings about Bridget. She and Mark defended her, a girl they didn’t know as well as those two people, but they defended her and she will always be grateful for it. It didn’t help that Bridget revealed every curve in that dress and smelled so sweet, like vanilla ice cream scented with rose water.

“Becky, I have an unorthodox request for you,” said Mark to her after their weekend from work.

“What can that be sir?” asked a surprised Becky. He rarely called her “Becky”, preferring her formal name instead when addressing the young woman.

“Well Bridget is going to the United States for a few weeks for some news reports and I plan to go with her for her personal and legal support, I was wondering if you’d care to come with us but you’d be welcome to take a vacation with us.”

“Sir, I could never turn down the chance to visit the United States. I could be within at least a few time zones to call my grandparents in San Diego.”

“Splendid! That is one of our first stops.”

Dammit Gillies, you really got yourself in a sticky spot now. How will you survive Mark and Bridget with you? Maybe this will be a game changer for you and you could stop having sweet dreams……about her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title inspired by a line from the Patsy Cline hit "Sweet Dreams" https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sweet_Dreams_(Don_Gibson_song)
> 
> Scandalous post-dinner dream is something I owe to _SFaith and her fic "The Gold Dress", a fic that inspired me to write this story. https://archiveofourown.org/works/5989285
> 
> Congrats to Doug Jones in Alabama and for beating a racist, bigoted, queer-hating pedo that chased teenage girls! You rock you lawyer who fought the KKK and won and achieved justice for those four little girls who died in the 1963 Birmingham bombing.
> 
> Sorry not sorry, Cosmo and Woney had it coming and I'm sure they would discriminate against Latinas like me who are lesbians with a minor in dick and would have voted for 45. 
> 
> Bridget is wearing this dress of Joan Holloway in the Second Season premiere of "Mad Men" http://planofeminino.com.br/wp-content/uploads/2016/06/christina-hendricks.jpg
> 
> Bridget's comforting words to Becky (at Smug Married gathering) were inspired by words delivered to Joan Crawford by Hedda Hopper in her dream at the "Feud: Bette & Joan 
> 
> "Don't worry sweetheart. You will always young. Always be beautiful. God does a few times. Frozen in Amber by (couldn't hear). Bette too, though it pains me to say it. Legends all."
> 
> Bridget's Eau de Vanilla Ice Cream with Rose Water? _SFaith gives Bridget a signature scent of "Vanilla Rose". This is my take on it (plus it's too perfect).


	5. Jacking It In San Diego

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rebecca introduces Mark and Bridget to her grandparents and there is some San Diego fluff.

San Diego: bright skies, great beaches, scenery, history, fun, culture, just a nice ride to Baja California, and where Becky’s grandparents Lieutenant and Nurse O’Hara will receive a visit from one of their beloved grandchildren and her new friends. Mark, being the son of an Admiral, knew just what to expect.

“So young man, you’ve come to my home with my darling granddaughter and this beautiful lady; tell me, what are your intentions?” asked the older man with a stare that had quieted a troop of young men once.

Mark (standing up and looking straight) said: “I’ve become a friend of hers and I am her employer, I know this arrangement is unorthodox, to say the least, but I assure you I have no dishonorable intentions towards her. Perhaps I felt she could use a trip to the States, she was under some stress recently.” So said he, with the bit of awareness that he and his fiancé had a hand in that stress, “me and Miss Jones have nothing but the best wishes for her, I assure you.”

“Good, but I warn you, I am keeping an eye on you.”

Nurse O’Hara kept an eye on Bridget as she and Rebecca watched the blonde woman sit at the sofa with her tea. Nurse had seen girls like Bridget before: pretty, good skin, bright eyes, gleaming smiles, curves in all the right places, ample bosoms, hair that any man would be pleased to put his hair through, the kind of girls who went by on life through their looks and never had to be graceful or particularly intelligent. “She is a sweet girl, I can quite see your dilemma, and I never thought I’d see my granddaughter lose her head like some of the men I was around during the War.” Rebecca blushed, “Grandmother, it’s so hard to let go, what could I do?” And she cupped her granddaughter’s cheek affectionately and smiled warmly as she looked at her: tall, slender, graceful, shiny brown hair, wholesome, fresh-faced, warm, and intelligent; the kind of woman who can make any other…woman feel lucky. It took the O’Hara’s a long time to accept their granddaughter as a lesbian; the older woman hoped she can make it up to her.

So they had their tea and went out to Old Town San Diego for dinner and browsed through the shops. The Americans and Australian watched as the two Brits stood fascinated at the taffy making at Cousin’s Old Town Candy Shop, they soon made their purchases of some old-fashioned licorice and peppermints with chocolate fudge. The next day, they drove on the long and high Coronado Bridge to the very posh Coronado Island where they looked at the homes and stopped at a beach to swim and dine on some pizza. The beach activities started with persuading Bridget to put on a swimsuit.

“You all go ahead, I don’t feel ready,” blushed Bridget. Rebecca was a bit confused, with a sad but knowing O’Hara’s looking concerned, while Mark replied “Bridget, you look fine, plus I was looking forward to going further into the water with you,” he winked.

Bridget blushed and started padding over the ladies changing shacks; Mark turned and whispered to Rebecca, “She is a bit self-conscious about her figure and weight.” Rebecca shouldn’t have been surprised, given how widespread the media images are and how society has a rather obsessive focus on women’s bodies and how they shame imperfections. But at the same time, Rebecca couldn’t really fathom what Bridget could feel insecure about, given how beautiful she was and how admired she was by both the opposite and same sex. Her hourglass curves, softness of body and face, sparkling eyes, touchable blonde hair, shapely and fit legs, and pink skin gave her an appeal of classical aesthetics. “Well dear! Back in my day, the boys or the Yanks as you call them would have stuck a picture of you in their foot lockers!” Rebecca heard her grandfather exclaim.

There was Bridget in this sunshine yellow bikini and coral pink lipstick: the triangular pieces of cloth were far apart to show off her ample cleavage while still containing and supporting them and were halter style; the bottoms were tied at each hip and ended just below her belly button. Bridget had a defined waist, a soft and rather untoned tummy, curvy hips and thighs that led down to her shapely calves and dainty ankles. Bridget walked blushing towards the edge of the water and Rebecca got an eye full of Bridget’s bottom. It was ample, shapely, rounded, and it provoked a significant amount of glances at the beach sands from many sexes….and ages. Babies erupted in pleasure and Becky even caught BOTH her grandparents looking longingly as Mark playfully chased a squealing Bridget into the waters and they started kissing.

“Wait till Baja takes a good look at her! They love Blondes in Latin America and love curvy women! She’s got both!”

As Rebecca pined for the next three days to finish so she and the Brits could head to New York and get Bridget’s journalist assignment finished and thought about the Panda Bears they’d see at the Zoo and the ships at the Maritime museum and the Naval port, she thought of her very good friends back in London.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> O'Hara is a reference to Maureen O'Hara (how did you know?)
> 
> The chapter title is a South Park reference (and yes I love San Diego) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xuvsoZLE3WE
> 
> I love visiting Old Town San Diego (and the candy shop is real) http://www.oldtownsandiegoguide.com/
> 
> I visited this museum when there was a temporary Titanic exhibit and loved it https://sdmaritime.org/
> 
> Travel to Coronado Island! (Just spend wisely) http://coronadovisitorcenter.com/
> 
> I went to the Naval Base to see the naval ship named for Cesar Chavez (Civil Rights Leader, look him up) be launched http://www.military.com/base-guide/naval-base-san-diego
> 
> There ish Pandas in the San Diego Zoo (haven't been since I was 8 sadly) http://zoo.sandiegozoo.org/
> 
> Remark at the end inspired by Lana Turner's experiences in Latin America (in the coffee table biography co-written by her daughter)
> 
> Bridget's bikini inspired by this pic of Marilyn Monroe https://www.google.com/search?hl=en&authuser=0&biw=1366&bih=662&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=6tM0WrjINsbNmwGH1Z7YBQ&q=Marilyn+Monroe+yellow+bikini&oq=Marilyn+Monroe+yellow+bikini&gs_l=psy-ab.3...15322.18129.0.18295.9.8.1.0.0.0.132.834.0j7.7.0....0...1c.1.64.psy-ab..1.1.131...0.0.zxrZ_dZbjyo#imgrc=PlJOczzNQz8O0M:


	6. I Get By With A Little Help from My Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Becky tells a bit about her friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy 2018 Folks

**Kali**

You and the gang ran across her at a coffee house, she was older and looked very interesting: modern but with slight touches of an urban American MTV punk rocker with some New Wave touches. She was open and very generous, full of wisdom, she really pushed you to be your best even at her harshest. Strange things seemed to happen around her, you remembered a time when you two were being followed by some sketchy man; she put a hand on your arm to stop. “Stay still,” she whispered into your ear, scared you obeyed. You heard her turn around to face the attacker, he mouthed something very crude about you and her and she said nothing. You then heard him wailing and cursing, she tells you to turn around and you find him being hung by the back of his trousers on a pole. You start to giggle and Kali pulls you and you start running. She would give some details about her friends in the United States but seemed to stop before giving any more information, it seemed like she left behind a painful past. She was always sophisticated, so it really puzzled you despite your better general knowledge, that she just got her equivalent of her secondary education completed.

**Fernando**

The 5’6”, thick-set, tanned and dark haired friend (with dimples at each mouth corner and a large nose) of yours joked to you that his parents fell in love with the ABBA song three weeks after you two have met. He is the proud son of Mexican immigrants and an excellent trainee chef that she ran into in her 2nd year in London. He is very creative with his craft: he once made fish and chips but with tilapia and several varieties of salsas, the Shepard’s Pie had chopped up carne asada and cilantro with a hint of chile, the bubble and squeak had an excellent herbal flavor, chorizo or longaniza sausages were used for Bangers and Mash, his pasties were savory or fruity sweet, that bread and butter pudding was sweet and spicy, and she’d have to introduce Bridget to those chocolate croissants of his that came with hints of more sugar or chile or cinnamon. He was often awkward and cheerful, he swore he had a handicap, but he and his parents didn’t have the time to see specialists. He spoke several languages aside from Spanish and English: German, French, Italian, Japanese, Danish, Polish, Russian, Egyptian, Farsi, and Punjabi. He could swim (that was how she ran across to Diana) and he was a joyful but clumsy dancer. He was openly flirtatious: flirted with many men and women, all the friends, Becky, and especially Bridget; something that made Mark very embarrassed. Especially since Fernando would offer Mark the chance to make some aphrodisiacs, in a straight-forward and innocent approach that assured Mark that it wasn’t an offensive comment but still made him wary.

**Olga**

A very serious ballerina who knew several forms of martial arts and was descended from Russian Aristocrats who fled post-Revolution. She was tall, broad-shouldered, narrow-hipped, flat chested, rounded in the tummy, pert arsed, her oval face had seen the sun and the evidence was on her tan and freckles, green eyes that gazed upon you, mouse brown hair that she cut sensibly, small ears, large feet attached to muscular legs, big hands, a hearty laugh, and with a very masculine style of dress. Sometimes she and Becky would be mistaken for a couple if they went alone, she did confide to her that she was tired of all this judgement about them and “No offense Becky, but everyone thinks me to be a lesbian because of the way I present myself, when I am inclined to men. It’s been suggested to me that I should be more feminine in my appearance, but we know how awkward I look in frills and florals and floaty frocks. I just wish people would get to know the real me and stop making assumptions.” Becky whole-heartedly agreed with her, glad that her acquaintance with Chiwetel brought her to Olga (she has a very mad crush on him). It was quite satisfying that someone can sympathize with her struggles……

**Chiwetel**

One cannot call him a handsome devil: he has a pleasant countenance but he isn’t particularly seductive and is a very serious monogamist (given his strict Christian upbringing) and bisexual (something his family had to get over, but they never found fault with his past mates). Broad smile and lips, rounded face, pleasant eyes and mouth, large horn-rimmed glasses, bearded, a gentleman who managed to charm even the steeliest and most narrow-minded Tory that Becky had the displeasure of meeting. “It is something we are old hat at Becky: we have to trim the fat and separate the wheat from the chaff in ourselves for presentation,” he said while Becky visited him at his grandmother’s house pampering and feeding her cats while they talked over tea and lemon biscuits. “We have to be very attractive, pleasant, intelligent, well-versed in verbal conversation, and be practically perfect because we are presenting our communities.” He admired Bridget (he actually met her once through Jeremy, Chiwetel was bringing some office documents over to his house in an emergency and Jeremy and Magda were entertaining guests at the time, yes even the rest of the Marrieds….poor dear): “She is a truly lovely woman, not in a sense put by decorum, but she is rather authentic in her manner and good-humored. I don’t think that lot of people with their designer clothing and furniture and stiff manners would have the willingness she has to pull herself up after a fall and try to get on with life. She is a true lady.” As a man who has seen things and heard things (some of which were related to Jeremy’s indiscretions) he never holds back from the truth, something that some of the other assistants and secretaries at the law firm are afraid to acknowledge, in a workplace that often took them for granted or treated them with condescension depending on the day of the week.

**Tom**

One of Bridget’s friends: a one hit wonder (Becky found his album) and very irreverent, he and she had their own jokes together. “Us homosexuals have to stick together you know,” he once whispered to her and confided he found Bridget’s old boyfriend Daniel cute (oh dear Daniel Cleaver, what a tangled weave you left, and that is ALL Becky will say on the matter). They often referred to each other as Tom Sawyer and Becky Thatcher in private.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes Kali is from "Stranger Things".
> 
> There was something in the air tonight.....
> 
> Chiwetel named for Chiwetel Ejiofor (even resembles him!)
> 
> How no one brings up Tom Sawyer and Becky Thatcher (RE: Rebecca and Tom) I don't know....
> 
> Yes, there are heterosexual butch women. Here is this scene from "But I'm A Cheerleader" to enlighten ya'll https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8NFxckpb-CY


	7. Welcome to New York

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kelly Radner from "Neighbors" and Becky are cousins!  
> 2000s fashion!  
> Bridget, Mark, Becky, and Kelly get a tour from Mac through NYC!  
> Mark gets hit on by lesbians!  
> Bridget interviews some "Mad Men" characters!  
> Bridget is gonna get Becky laid!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title inspired by Taylor Swift's (underrated IMO) song "Welcome To New York".

“What up my Cousin!?! Who are these old folks?”

This was Mark and Bridgets’ introduction to Rebecca’s Cousin Kelly: a woman about the same age, height, beauty, and frame as Rebecca but much more extroverted and wild. There she was: all in pink, pink slouchy tube top with a matching short skirt with a white tank top underneath the tube top and with some long beaded necklaces looped around….she was even wearing these pointed kitten heels in a tie-dye of yellow, orange, and shocking pink. She even had some bright pink makeup that made her look like a doe-eyed baby doll. Hair affixed with butterfly clips, very girlish and “mad” as Bridget put it.

Becky composed herself: “Kelly, this is my employer Mark Darcy and his fiancée Bridget; both are very dear friends of mine and Bridget happens to be interviewing some stars of the post-war advertising boom for a work assignment.” Becky smiled, feeling very confident and excited about what New York City, a city that was close to claiming her boss and one that Bridget managed to win one over. Kelly smiled sweetly “Of course, I’m so glad you two are with my cousin,” she looks at Bridget “I see you’re very gorgeous, I can see why this man would turn down working here and why my cousin would fall for you.” There goes Kelly, loving but embarrassing, Bridget blushes “I’m very charmed to meet you, you look very fit and slim, and however do you manage?” “It’s the genes, most of us women are naturally thin, but we do get varicose veins in the breasts after popping out a sprog!” Kelly laughed and turned to Mark, “And you,” putting her arm on his shoulder “are gonna to love my boyfriend Mac, he’s American and very Jewish,” she cooed.

“What’s up Becky?!? Future Cousin-in-law!”

A tall (not as tall as Mark), curly topped pale man with brown eyes and hair and a plump figure and eyeglasses appears long taupe cargo pants, sneakers, a long-sleeved gray shirt under a t shirt advertising an American burger franchise called “White Castle” appears. He is jovial and very intimate-seeming with her cousin. “Could this relationship be more serious than I thought?” thought Becky. Something had to give for how Kelly, all of the sudden, decided to apply for an American visa since she was only planning to spend a semester or two in the United States. This made feel Becky feel very lonely, “everyone has someone, but me.”

“Mac, I assume you have an itinerary for how you’d like to introduce this city to us?” asked Mark in a stiffly formal manner that had to force Becky and Bridget to suppress giggles.

“Just get your groove on man for you and your cute girlfriend and I’ll show ya!” The American and extroverted Australian whooped.

Just for Mark’s scholarly interests in history and for Mac to fulfill some demands of his _bubbe_ , they went to the tenement museum in the Lower East Side and to Ellis Island; they made plans to visit Coney Island and took a trip to the top of the Empire State building and managed to squeeze a photo of the group in front of the Statue of Liberty (they made plans to ferry there in a few days), they all took Becky for drinks and dancing at the Cubbyhole where Becky got flirted with by some women and even noticed that everyone (but Mac due to his facial stubble) was getting hit on by a few American lesbians. Mark wasn’t sure to be amused, flattered, or annoyed that some women mistook him for a butch woman.

“How is it do I look like a woman?”

There was one day where Becky and her cousins (this includes Mac, whom she feels Kelly would one day marry) got to sit in with Mark on some interviews Bridget had with people during the Madison Avenue boom. The first ones to be interviewed were: Peggy Olson Rizzo (a now retired Creative Director who started out as a secretary), Joan Holloway Harris (a retired secretary turned agency partner turned company-owner and producer), Pete Campbell (agency partner turned board member of Learjet), Ken Cosgrove (agency account man turned board member of the infamous Dow Chemical), and (upon Bridget’s idea for a well-rounded profile of women in Madison Avenue) Cynthia Cosgrove and Trudy Campbell to provide their views as ad wives of an era where the role of women was rapidly changing.

The interviewees got to talk about how their marriages fared or suffered, the women commented on how the workplace treated women like themselves working there and how it even impacted the wives who were waiting patiently in the suburbs or lunching in the city, the changing roles of people of color who started out in service roles and started joining the ranks of creative and the secretarial pool, how technology changed their profession, how relationships started in the workplace, the naughtiness of the office (Bridget giggled when Joan and Peggy confided in her that they have shagged their bosses), how it felt to see the models they worked with become thinner and thinner (Peggy and Joan, in particular, found it unfortunate), tragedies (like the suicide of agency co-partner Lane Pryce, whose son Bridget had interviewed once and the deaths of other partners in recent decades like Don Draper, Ted Chauogh, and Roger Sterling), and about how they rose to the positions they are now.

“You might see me again sometime, I see you are scheduled to interview my husband Stan,” said Ms. Rizzo. The elder woman smiled, her rounded and wrinkled face revealing a wide pink smile and a twinkle in her vivid blue eyes, “I will bring my friend Joyce Ramsay, the photographer, just for the hell of it.” This caused a small but vivid brainstorm in Bridget: “Yes that won’t be a problem at all.” The tall, older woman who was very wide-hipped and with an enormous bosom that looked as though it was supported by buttresses whipped her still red hair  into Bridget’s view and said “I could bring you my old clothes, darling, I think you would fit into them and look very beautiful. I had a figure like yours once,” winked Joan.

So now Bridget was to interview the eldest child of the late Don Draper, Sally (the only one of his children who showed up to interview), photographer and illustrator Stan Rizzo, Shirley Sinclair (former secretary turned travel agency junior partner), and Dawn Chambers (former secretary turned retired head supervisor at Holloway Harris). She planned to rest with Rebecca and planned to drag her once again: she got the feeling good things were to happen to Rebecca’s love life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This pink 2004 Kids Choice Awards outfit of Hilary Duff inspired Kelly's outfit https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/hilary-duff-style_us_56a7a016e4b0172c65943205   
> I was too tempted to make a "Neighbors" reference because I thought that Rose Byrne looks a lot like Jacinda Barrett.  
> Cubbyhole is a real LGBT bar.   
> Doesn't Colin Firth look a bit butch? ;)  
> I promise this stuff with the "Mad Men" characters will lead somewhere and aren't you all happy to see them in the 2000s?  
> Bridget is the prettiest Fairy Godmother in the world, isn't she?


	8. Just Another Shoe Horned Plot for Jollies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bridget and Becky spend time in their birthday suits and talk.
> 
> Bridget has plans for Becky.

While Kelly and Mac took Mark on their weed run…..Bridget and Becky decided to have some girl time….in the nude.

“Becky what movies did you bring for us to watch?” asked Bridget, who was sheathed (and rather adorably) in her red pajamas with the white sheep.

Becky blushed while in her pink lace trimmed pajamas that her Granny Gillies got her: something a princess would wear but made her look like an overgrown juvenile with her frame and fresh face. “Well I brought _Clueless_ , _Persuasion_ , _Now, Voyager_ , _Dangerous When Wet_ , _Carmen Jones_ , and _Some Like It Hot_ ,” stated the younger woman while she cognitively compared Bridget to the stars of those movies, sadly even the glamourous and beautiful women in those films paled in comparison to Bridget. “Will I ever be able to find true love if I keep with this attitude?” fretfully thought Becky. She tries to break out of that funk: “If we have more time, we could watch Hercules, it was quite thoughtful of you to bring some Milk Tray and chardonnay, maybe we can order pizza takeaway and get room service to bring Pina Coladas.” Becky felt satisfied.

“You really need to join in whenever the Urban Family gets together,” smiled Bridget “you have the brilliant ideas and all the sense of fun needed.” Bridget starts looking pinker: “is it me or is it getting hotter in here?” Rebecca suddenly noticed why she was sweating so much….and it wasn’t the movement of Bridget’s curves in those pajamas. “I think I will call room service for this.” Rebecca picked up the phone and dialed, put her ear to the earpiece and talked as soon as she heard a “Hello?”

“Hello this is Rebecca Gillies from Room 333; I seem to have noticed the room has gotten quite warm, I know I’m not running a fever since my bedmate is feeling quite heated herself.” Rebecca listened and said “Oh?” and replied “Well thank you, I understand you are doing what you can. Have a lovely evening.” She hung up the phone and turned to Bridget, “the receptionist explained that the heater is on the ‘fritz’ and it will take them a while to fix it and get the air conditioning running, I wonder how we can relieve of ourselves.”

Bridget smiled, “Well I have an idea and we have some ice, but promise not to be disgusted.” Bridget started peeling off her sleeping bottoms and unbuttoning her top, Becky started feeling hot and she tried to not notice the blonde’s pulchritude and deflect to…. “Why are you wearing a bra under your top?” Bridget looked down and said, “Because I’m afraid I look saggy without it and I read that Marilyn Monroe slept in her brassiere to keep her breasts looking lovely. I just feel that without the perfect underwear, exercises, contacts, makeup, and tweezers…I’d be a flabby, floppery hairy mess in the wild.” Rebecca blushed and admitted “If it makes you feel better, I am wearing my bra under this top just because I feel it makes me look like I have an actual bust and these pajamas may look childlike on me but make me look less like a 14 year old boy.” Rebecca started peeling off her pajamas.

“Look at you, with a nice flat toned tummy” said Bridget in a playfully envious tone. Becky smiled and then looked about her body and thought of her bum and chest “that’s not the only thing that is completely flat.” She looked at Bridget and said: “You do have a beautiful body, very classic and voluptuous with these hourglass lines.” Bridget blushed “thank you but I can imagine you get to wear more outfits and look terrific in them, you could wear anything.” Becky retorted “Maybe so but with your curves, I feel you can fill out some tops and have these pinup appearances, I feel you could have done some modeling or been a movie star in the old days, men probably would have paid to have seen you dance in a bikini.”

Bridget hugged Becky, the younger woman feeling the weight and softness of the older woman’s bosom “I need to be around you more,” giggled Bridget.

So they watched their movies together in the nude, only putting on a bathrobe when the pizza and drinks arrived. Sometime towards the climax of _Some like It Hot_ , Mark and the others showed up panting and all pink and struck by the nudity of the two women. Mac gawked “I always thought British women were kind of prudish, but Bridget, you got it going on,” and he elbowed Mark with a “You are a lucky man” look on his face.

Before they retired to bed, Bridget told Becky “You must come with me tomorrow, I do get the feeling you must come, and your life will change.”

Becky wondered what that could be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love the movies and stars mentioned here. 
> 
> Pina Coladas are a fave drink of mine and a friend.


	9. At Last

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spoiler (snicker): Becky finally finds love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Sniff* My Becky gets her happy ending, no sad ending for this queer story *goes off to cry*

“Well when I started in the advertising business, I was working as a secretary after delivering my application to Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce. I had seen their ad claiming they were an equal opportunity workplace and decided it was worth a shot despite the fact I’d have to take the subway from Harlem….”

Becky heard a Ms. Dawn Chambers talk to Bridget about how she came to be head supervisor of Human Resources at Holloway-Harris Productions in the 1960s and 70s when her eyes lingered on the other people who have been interviewed by or are waiting for their turn with Bridget. Already interviewed was Sally Draper (on behalf of her younger brothers who couldn’t make it due to family commitments) who works as a liaison and interpreter for clients coming from Latin America and Asia, Shirley Sinclair gave her piece about what it was like to be one of two minority women working in advertising, Michael Ginsburg talked about being a Jewish man with mental health issues and his Holocaust past during his career, and finally the retired photographer and illustrator Stan Rizzo came with his wife Peggy and a very relaxed older woman with her hair in a simple ponytail.

Becky peered at the woman with the ponytail while Mr. Rizzo talked to Bridget about how he had first started in free-lance in the 50s and about his wild night with Peggy when Don Draper assigned them to work on a cold drops account and spoke of how his views on women have evolved through that period enough for him to work for and marry a woman who’d surpass him in prestige in her career. The ponytailed woman was about Bridget’s height albeit slimmer and less bosomy, dark gray hair that has clearly been a rich chocolate color in her youth, black-ink eyes, and a very intelligent visage that barely has any make up or even just some foundation or chapstick. She was wearing some chunky silver and turquoise jewelry, layered two polo shirts (a bright green over a seafoam shade), a neutral plaid blazer, form-fitting khakis, a belt with a big buckle the shape of a heart, and tan colored penny loafers. The older woman caught Becky looking at her and winked. Becky blushed and touched her stomach, felt like butterflies were trapped in there. Becky felt a large hand on her shoulder: “It’s all right, you have handled more distressing matters before” she turned and found a consoling and smiling Mark.

An hour later, Bridget joined Mark and Becky (Becky’s cousins were going to take a trip to a club in Bushwick) for lunch at Katz’s Deli, she was flanked by the Rizzo’s and the older woman.

“Mark, Becky you have met Stan and Peggy, this is their friend Joyce Ramsay. She worked as a photographer for Life magazine and travels a great deal across the pond from here to the UK on photographic assignments. Ms. Ramsay, this is my fiancé Mark Darcy and his assistant _and_ our dear friend, Rebecca Gillies.”

Joyce and Becky took each other’s hand, “Hello Ms. Gillies, it’s finally nice to meet you in person after we have been staring at one another.”

**_Several Months Later….._ **

It was Mark and Bridgets’ wedding, the bride was beautiful in a strapless sweetheart neckline white silk gown that showed off her curves, and Becky was dressed in a bright lavender rose silk dress….with Joyce at her side. The two have been exchanging emails, writing letters, and sharing conversations with one another for a long period of time and have gotten closer and closer. As the Bride and Groom kissed (to Becky’s surprise, Mark really leaned in and passionately kissed Bridget before the Vicar could finish his sentence), she and Joyce clutched each other’s palms. Joyce couldn’t be around for everything and she knew what Becky’s past with Bridget was like, but Becky found that things got slightly more and more easy as time went on. She still had feelings for Bridget, but she found being with Joyce was more secured and more comforting, she really felt one with her.

It was a lovely wedding, and she caught Bridget’s parents giving Geoffrey Alconbury looks that could melt a pyramid when he approached the bride and groom. Becky smiled, later Joyce elbowed her and said “They are going to toss the bouquet, do you really want to miss out on it?” Becky smiled back and said “Never” and walked off to the crowd of single women and young girls.

Joyce lovingly stared at the young woman in the crowd: towering over unapologetically in her 4 inch stiletto heels, in a bright colored dress that made her stand out from the crowd, her long brown hair shining and bouncing over her back, with a smile that could have lit up Manhattan during that blackout she lived through in the Sixties; how did she get so lucky? Becky was so beautiful, but more so very intelligent and stronger than how she looked, this was a young woman who wasn’t afraid to fall and willing to work for and gain more than what was given to her. Reminded her of Peggy in a way, she understood what Becky went through with Bridget.

Rebecca Dionne Gillies was more than any woman she was ever with….

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title a reference to the Etta James classic so beautifully covered by Beyonce.
> 
> Joyce's thoughts about Becky echo the lyrics to "If I Dare" by Sara Bareilles which was written for the film "Battle of the Sexes" (support Intersectional Cinema people)
> 
> I liked coming up with theories for what the futures of Sally and Shirley were. 
> 
> Joyce is no fuddy duddy in the 2000s ;) Remember layering polo tanks?
> 
> It never sat right with me how Bridget's parents tolerated Geoffrey Alconbury's butt groping towards Bridget, seeing as they are her parents, I thought they would set limits with him or kick him out their home. 
> 
> Details from the wedding and for the next chapter have been inspired by SFaith's old stories. 
> 
> Actually was listening to the song and watching "Battle of the Sexes" while completing this story. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mUAKjRTVE_g


	10. June Bride

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Becky changes her life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah I named this chapter after a Bette Davis movie of the same movie....whatchu gonna do about it? ;)

“Comfortable?”

“I’m fine, as long as I have your beautiful face beside me and this little munchkin by me,” said Joyce as she playfully tousles a little boy’s hair.

“Can I has cookie?” asked the little boy.

“I’d say yes but your Auntie Becky and parents would say ‘No’.”

“Mother, Father; could you sit down?”

“Yes darling but what seems to the rush?” asked Lotus.

Several more people, including Mr. Gillies and the Darcy’s have joined the table for some lunch or “nosh” as Joyce’s friend Michael put it. As everyone sat down, Beck stood up with a small box.

“Everyone I have an important announcement to make to Joyce and with you as witnesses.”

It was June 25th, 2011. In the past three years, Becky had moved from London to New York City for promotion to a partner at Abbot & Abbot…and no kidding…..for Joyce. They have moved together that Christmas and worked a great groove together. Becky’s friends from London came to visit or called or emailed her or reached out to her on Twitter and Facebook when they could. Kali, who was in town for a whole month, had approved of Joyce and found her very striking; a relief to Becky given how Kali has a rather cynical view of the whole of humanity. Kali’s friends from Hawkins, Indiana came to see her and they had dinner with Joyce’s own friends; a Nancy Wheeler was soon deep in conversation with Ms. Harris, talking over the memories of their dear, late friend (for Nancy) and distant niece (Joan’s) while Kali commiserated with a Jane Hopper and her friend Max with Peggy and Sally joining in. Stan went somewhere with a Mr. Dustin Henderson and the both of them came back drunk. This month, they had the Darcy family over: Mark and Bridget with their little boy, age two. The day before, New York State legalized same-sex marriage, which led to Becky’s decision in front of all their friends and her parents.

“Joyce Ramsay, will you marry me?”

“Yes, I will.”

Later that night, after putting on their pajamas and resting in front of the TV, Joyce kissed Becky on the lips and cuddled next to her on the bed singing “All I want to get is a little bit closer….all I want to know is….can you come a little closer….” Becky snuggled in a lot closer, enveloped by the warmth of Joyce’s body. She has never felt so safe, so accepted, and so warm, so loved as she does now.

**_June 24 th, 2012_ **

“I now pronounce you, Joyce Phoebe Ramsay and Rebecca Dionne Gillies, to be lawfully wedded wives,” intoned the Priest of a progressive NYC parish who then smiled “and lock lips.”

Becky stood there, in a vintage white jumpsuit and very high heels (her something borrowed was Bridget’s Elsa Peretti heart and blue was the seamless panties and earrings she wore matching her eyeshadow) in front of Joyce in an attractive figure showing but not curve hugging white suit.

This was a wedding that was lovingly attended and prepared by their friends and family. Stan Rizzo designed the Wedding invitations (with some water color by Mark) while Peggy co-wrote with Bridget (through text and email) the inscriptions to those invitations. Becky’s parents paid for the ceremony and the reception and even spent a month helping Becky prepare emotionally. Patricia and her friends from Barden University even volunteered their time to sing at the Church and perform during the Family-Bride dance (Joyce’s parents are long gone and she has some relatives around) and the first dance as spouses; Brigitte and Tom did lead vocals. Mark’s Uncle, Joan and Sally, Magda, and Fernando all prepared and directed the preparation of meals. Kali and Chloe did make up, with some assistance from Jude and Shazzer with hair by Steve Harrington (in this lovely and Liz Taylor-esque up do). Esther, Paul, Chiwetel and Olga (who are now engaged, to Becky’s delight), Kelly, and Mac all helped decorate the church and the tables at the reception. Along with Joyce’s parents, a lot of Becky’s grandparents couldn’t make it, as they all passed on. Becky’s Grandmother O’Hara did attend, sitting with relatives and the Darcy’s; she even took charge of childcare with Peggy’s old friend Julio and Michael Ginsberg, where they watched over the Darcy son, Becky’s nieces and nephews, Magda and Jeremy’s children, and the grandchildren of Joyce’s friends and family.

Becky got to sit with Bridget and observe all the going-ons at the wedding, Joyce was getting along beautifully with Mark’s surly and slightly sexist Uncle (“It was nothing,” she said later “you should have met Rizzo back in the old days, he was worse!”), Becky’s parents were delighted with Bridget, Kali and Joan were getting drunk together, Jane Hopper and her step-brothers Will and Jonathon Byers were having a good time with Sally Draper and her younger brothers; Magda, Jeremy, the Campbells, Cosgroves, Wheeler siblings, Max and her partner Lucas, Dustin (with both Chloe and Brigitte) got rip-roaring drunk on some vodka mixed with Guinness and really partied hard. Whacking each other’s heads with folding chairs and laughing while they smacked each other’s arses; before she started dancing on the table and took her naughty panties off, Magda got to spank both Mark’s and Bridget’s bottoms and urged them to shake their “big tit arses!” and her panties got to land on a young buxom brunette who then urged her older and plumper silver box partner under the table with her and she tossed the panties in the air and they then landed on a part of the floor near Lotus. Lotus picked up the panties and smugly tossed them between the Darcy’s and Rizzo’s who soon fought for the panties as Lotus walked off with Mr. Gillies.

After those shenanigans were over, came the wedding toasts and Becky and Joyce went off on a Vespa scooter from the 1960s to the airport; they came to their apartment ready to make love and get the packing ready for their honeymoon to Spain, France, Portugal, and Switzerland; they looked forward to eating tapas and paella.

“This is a great ride, glad I saved it from my youth.”

“It is, thanks for letting me drive it Joyce.”

“My darling wife, my fellow traveler, my muse, my partner, the one who colors my world.”

**_February 13, 2013_ **

Becky was very exhausted but cheerful. Her beautiful baby girl was just born (through C-Section) and they never wanted for anything; it helped that Joyce was massaging her palm and was following the surgeon’s recommendations for healing and pampering her young wife. “My Fair Lady, is it too early to start discussing names for the baby? I for one wouldn’t want something too old-fashioned or something so ridiculous that it seems to be an act of us flaunting our class and racial privilege,” snarked Joyce thinking of how the Sloane Ranger crowd named their kids. “But something classic, something with an appeal and a meaning, a name for someone talented…and will get her in a good college.”

Becky tried to stifle her giggle, it still hurt to laugh even a bit without her belly feeling like it was on fire. She loved how Joyce had an outlook that she never really came across before and desired to be as indifferent to the opinions of others, so indifferent that Joyce actually functioned and thrived in the career world without all the trappings of her generation…and wearing trousers out in the open. But focus: she needed to come up with a name for their baby.

“All understandable, but let us not try to name her after people we know.”

“Sophia?”

“No I don’t quite see her as Sophia. How about Emma, it’s a lovely and classical name isn’t it?”

“We name her ‘Emma’ and Bridget will go Austen-crazy with Peggy.”

“How about ‘Amelia’? We can name her after a very strong woman and role model.”

“Quite but not where I was going at, I was thinking ‘Piper’.”

“Not after your favorite song Joyce, no I rather liked ‘Sandra’.”

“Sandra? Well it is a nice name and I liked the definition of it, really ties into your job.”

“Sandra Ramsay-Gillies, I love the ring to it.”

“And add Lorraine as her middle name for a flourish and as a nice gift for your Mother.”

Becky smiled; she loved how Joyce really got on well with her parents and valued her family as well as she does their autonomy. “That is very lovely and would make my parents less guilty about their flight being late.”

The Nurse (a sturdy, sweet-faced non-binary youth) came with a small pink bundle and whispered “She has done her test and passed remarkably, the doctors need a name for the certificate.” Zhe handed the baby gently to Joyce, who cooed and snuggled the delicate child.

“I and the Missus have decided to name her: Sandra Lorraine Ramsay-Gillies.”

**_December 6, 2041_ **

“I now pronounce you two Mr. Darcy and Mrs. Ramsay-Gillies, now lock lips.”

Now greyer, a bit wrinkled, and in a baby blue suit Becky sits serenely with the pleased and lucid Joyce as they watch their eldest child wed her former boss’s and former infatuation’s child. She and Joyce have raised five children: two girls and three boys. Sandra (birth), Ben (adopted), Giles (the sperm donor was Giles from Becky’s old work), Fernando (Becky’s birth and a promise to Fernando that she’d name a child after him after he won their bet), and Lucy (birth and after Joyce’s old boss at a magazine she worked for once). Now they were all grown and following their own paths in life: Sandra is a writer for several online news sources and once interned at _Teen Vogue_ , Ben is working at an image rehabilitation program for the borough of Queens, Fernando is developing his career in sculptures and is working at as a student assistant to a ceramics teacher, and Lucy is working in a undergrad internship for the library at Wellesley College. Several years ago, Sandra had moved to London for work and started interacting more with the Darcy family (she confessed to having had nursed a crush on the son in her younger years) and just several months ago, she called Becky.

“Mom, guess what? I’m going to propose marriage to him!”

Joyce observed Becky’s face just now; she had always observed and participated in the rearing of their children. But it impressed her to know how Becky managed a home, assimilated to another country, raised children with a much older spouse, socialized, and was able to succeed in her career. Becky was an empathetic, firm, and diplomatic boss who drew boundaries and openly communicated with her employees. “I learned from the best and the better,” Becky lovingly told her. Being married to a kindly, gracious, elegant, diligent, caring, curious beauty was a decision she never looked on with regret and she was glad she stuck around long enough to see their daughter marry.

**_February 13, 2090_ **

What am I doing right now? I am dying: surrounded by my children, grandchildren, great grandchildren, friends, descendants of friends, former employees, Patricia and her husband, nieces, nephews, cousins…this isn’t a sad occasion. I have lived to be 108 years old and enjoyed a full life with love and adventure, I had a lovely family. My wife passed on during our eldest daughter’s honeymoon, even when I tentatively re-entered the dating scene, she still lived on in my heart and mind. It was quite lovely for my eldest granddaughter to be named “Joyce” in her honor. I liked to think Joyce was having a ball with all her dear friends who passed on and re-connected with her parents. Mark hung on until his 90th birthday, on that same day; me and Bridget spent years together as widows and friends until she passed on at the age of 105. Despite their absence, I gloried in the fruits of our relationships: the union of our children, the births of our grandchildren, and I got to enjoy spending time with our great grandchildren. Now I’m lying down, warm in my bed waiting to re-join those I loved, and proudly looking back at a life where I went out and lived my fullest life.

_This fanfic was a labor of love and meant a lot to me. I couldn’t have done it without the following people: the ladies at my Feminist book club, the people I know at Democratic Women of Kern, my beloved H who makes me feel safe and loved as Joyce does Becky, and _sfaith who has inspired me to write this fic. I also dedicate this to all the Beckys: all the queer kids and even non-queer kids who felt like no one would love them for who they are and that nothing about them was acceptable and the ones who feel they’d never find love and happiness. Don’t lose hope, you will find it. You are loved, you are important, you will do good things, you will find people who love and understand you, and you will try your best to live life to the fullest. I guarantee that._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That bit I put in the end? I meant it all.
> 
> Abbott & Abbott was that firm that accepted Mark at the end of "Bridget Jones's Diary"...until he changed his mind.
> 
> My birthday is 02/13/1990
> 
> Joan and Barb are totally related
> 
> "Phoebe" is an intriguing name to me (and appropriate for Joyce's generation) and means "shining, brilliant"
> 
> Don't you want to see Magda go wild?
> 
> "Piper" a reference to a 1960s song called "Pied Piper" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IYODJsg8_dA
> 
> "Sandra" means "defender of men" (Becky is a lawyer after all....)
> 
> Ben named for "Ben Hargrove" (Kenny's pen name) and Lucy for Henry Luce, who co-started Time Magazine and bought Life magazine. "I say it's better than even money Mr. Luce finds a tastefuI way to do this." (Mystery Date)
> 
> The bit about Queens was intentional snark at a certain orange tinted President

**Author's Note:**

> Yes Rebecca is related to Kelly from "Neighbors", one-shot character Lotus from the Mad Men Season 6 episode "A Tale of Two Cities", and to Fat Amy.  
> Hibiscus Island a reference to "Muriel's Wedding".  
> Domincia is supposed to be a beetle browed Amy Farrah Fowler.  
> Title a reference to "The Children's Hour".  
> Yes Rebecca's middle name is a reference to Dionne Warwick.


End file.
